Out with the Old...

As support for the Wii comes to a close and Nintendo looks forward to the Wii U, it's time to look back on the upstart white box that took everyone by surprise.

Review: The Conduit

Platform: Wii

Players: 1 (up to 8 online)

Rating: Teen (Blood, Mild Language, Violence)

Developer: High Voltage Software

Publisher: SEGA

Since this review is going live on July 4th, it's only fitting to do a "patriotic" game.  There's really not many examples of "modern" patriots in gaming.  Save, of course, for Michael Ford.

Review: Xenoblade Chronicles

Platform: Wii

Rating: Teen (Blood, Mild Language, Partial Nudity, Use of Alcohol and Tobacco, Violence)

Players: 1

Xenoblade Chronicles has finally reached American Shores!  It's been over a year in the making, and about time.  I couldn't wait to dive into this title from the moment I picked it up.  And dated engine aside, it's got its charms.  For the readers across the pond in Europe, put up with us for a bit.  This game is new to us, even though it's a year old.

Top 5 Bad Ideas in Video Games

Thanks, XKCD!

Bad ideas seem to invariably start with a frat boy origin. "Guys, we should do this.  It would be totally awesome if we do this!"

And then, they fall flat on their face.  Every industry has its share of good ideas and bad ideas.  It just happens that the bad ideas in the video game industry are far more humorous than other industries.  Video games have had their share of gaffes, and some of these are worthy of making a Top 5 over it.  So, here's my Top 5 bad ideas in video games.

AO Ratings: should they really be a kiss of death?

The Adults Only rating, or AO for short, has long been seen as a "kiss of death" to a video game.  Most if not all retailers will outright refuse to stock an AO game, and the rating itself is largely associated with porn, sex, and the most depraved violence out there.  But, perhaps the fear of an AO rating is doing more harm than good.  Here's a couple of ideas on how to make AO work, and where it can and should be used.

Top 5 Light Gun Games

It's no secret that I have a serious penchant for light gun games.   Something about the actual pointing the gun controller on screen and pulling the trigger lends it a unique feel, something much different than most shooting games out there.  For that reason, I'm going to spend today's Top 5 on my:

Top 5 Light Gun Games

Top 5 Strangest Bosses

One staple of video games is the bosses.  They make for a great end to a level, and they serve to prepare the transition to the next level.  But every now and again, you'll run across a boss that makes you scratch your head, say, "what the f***?" and walk away.  With that in mind, here's:

Top 5 Strangest Bosses

Top 5 Creepiest Non-Player Characters (NPCs)

Non-Player Characters, or NPCs, are a staple of most single player games.  They can be hapless civilians, wizened teachers, or merchants willing to keep you stocked in exchange for a few coin.  As always, however, there will be at least a few characters that make you scratch your head and wonder what is wrong with them.  Here's my picks for:

Top 5 Creepiest NPCs

5. Christopher (Shadows of the Damned) 

Christopher is not so much creepy as he is misunderstood.  It's easy to brush him off as another demon at first glance, but he's got his charms.  I still can't forget that cut scene when you first meet him. Of all the faces he could have made, why did he have to choose this one?






4. The Merchant (Resident Evil 4)

"Geetings, Strange-ah!"  Just the way that he greets you is more than slightly unsettling.  When you factor in the firepower he's packing at some of his shops, you really have to worry that this guy isn't going to go on a murderous spree or fund people who will.  I dunno about this one, he just seems like a loose trigger.









3. Plasma Man (Mystical Ninja Starring Goemon)

 PU-LA-ZU-MAAA! He sure doesn't wear much. I wonder if that's how he attained enlightenment?  Those awful, heavy clothes must really weigh down your brain.  If we all go nude, maybe we'll be as wise as him!  (Seriously guys, DON'T DO THIS!!!)




2. Happy Mask Salesman (Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask)

Yeah...this is one guy you don't want to make angry.  One minute, he's all smiles.  The next, he's about ready to slit your throat.  He really needs to relax.  Perhaps a cruise to Koholint island would give him the stress relief he needs...










1. Great Fairy (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)

I'm not even going to say anything about this one.  Just watch the video...

Are you creeped out yet?  Good!  I'll see you again in two weeks.

The end is nigh! (and that's not a bad thing)

There's an apocalypse coming!  And we're NOT gonna die!




Whut?




There's an old proverb: "those who do not remember the past are doomed to repeat it."  It means that we can learn from past mistakes to prevent future ones.  What if repeating history would be good instead?  Before you start dismissing this as a 2012 rant, it's not.  Gaming is on the cusp of another crash, and I can't wait for that to happen.

2011: Year in Review and Game of the Year

It's a big year for video games.

With spaceships and zombies in flames.

We've seen booms and busts

in under 12 months,

And all of it from games we play.

All joking and limericks aside, it's been an amazing year in gaming. 2011 saw Sony's flagship PlayStation Network get breached, a plethora of huge titles released, and even a few long-awaited reboots. So now, let's take a look at the last 12 months for a Year in Gaming: 2011

Top 5 Video Game Openings that Tell you Nothing About the Game you're Playing

I'm starting up something new now:  I liked writing that 5 Wii Games article, and there's enough content I can do to warrant adding an extra article each week.  So, this one will be every other Thursday, for starters.  If I can keep it up, it will become a weekly column here.  So anyways, to start this blog off, here's:

Top 5 Video Game Cinematics that Tell you Nothing About the Game you're Playing

Review: MADWORLD

Platform: Wii
Rating: M for Mature (Blood and Gore, Drug Reference, Intense Violence, Mature Humor, Sexual Themes, Strong Language)
Players: 1-2
Price: $9.99 new

Now here's a game that feels dramatically out of place on a "family friendly" console.  Gratuitous violence, profane language, and silly over-the-top gameplay, all in one package.  Put the kids to bed, it's time for the REAL action to start!

Ooga Booga Booga!

Halloween always gets people in a mood to soil their trousers.  Everybody and their mother tries to capitalize on this season, and game companies are no exception.  The survival horror genre has been around since the original nintendo era, but I feel that the genre as a whole is in need of a spark of life, a la Frankenstein.

Or this guy.  He's scary enough.

5 Wii games for the hardcore gaming crowd

It's no secret that Nintendo maintains a family friendly image.  The level of marketing to the parents of young children feels like the brunt of Nintendo's marketing budget. With the lack of Pandora's Tower and Fatal Frame 4 in the US, it's very easy to dismiss Nintendo as yet another greedy corporation who only cares about where they can make the most money.  Even so, Nintendo still pays attention to their core audience in some form or another.  Whether you believe it or not, the Wii has several games that cater to the interests of the hardcore gamer.  Here's 5 of them that you should be interested in:

Duct Tape DDR...Wait, what?

Back when I was in college, I made a modification to one of my DDR dance pads.  The top side was starting to rip, and I figured I'd go for the whole enchilada and give the entire dance pad a makeover.  This little duct tape mod took me about 3 hours to complete, and looked great when it was done.  That dance pad has since bit the dust, but I kept the pictures and reference notes I took, just in case.  Well, now is the time to resurrect this bad boy and pass along what I learned.